There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
The air was thick with penises
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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