# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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