Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize