What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
