im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize