ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize