I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
We talked him into tasing himself.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
