it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize