we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
