Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
How's work?
Spinning.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
