That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
