She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Randomize