You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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