yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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