hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
found the other keg... it's in the tree
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize