Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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