And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
