i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
