Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize