I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
