I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
