Swine flu. Run for my life!
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
My pussy is not your playground.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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