didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
