A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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