I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
I understand Curling. That high.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize
