Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
I forgot wine drunk hurts
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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