Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize