oh fat girl friday strikes again...
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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