dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Randomize
