thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i just google imaged poop.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
