Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
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