I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
