Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
