Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Found your dick twin last night
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
