people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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