That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize