Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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