and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
