she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Randomize
