True but thats because hes a fetus.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
