But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize