I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
