he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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