Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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