I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize