is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
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