i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize