How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
