i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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