He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
